when exactly did I become a woman?

Someone recently referred to me as a woman {which is better, I suppose, than her referring to me as a man}. But the word sat on me funny. Woman.

I tried to remember when I crossed over to that woman side, leaving the girl behind. Granted I am thirty-something, driving the Bling, with three kids needing my constant provision. But woman?

I'm not so sure if I can find the tune for such a song.

photo credit - M. Angel Herrero

I think I know me too well. I know my childlike need to learn the same truths again and again and again. I see Him clearly as Father, but to think He might define me as His woman-daughter causes my voice to crack a bit off key.

{Thinking}


I guess we all struggle to truly hear. He defines us one way and we wrestle to believe.

He declares us forgiven, yet we drag around those rusty chains of condemnation. He describes us as new, yet we live under the bondage of old strongholds. He covers us with freedom words, yet the slave clothes fit comfortable and worn.

Why do we do that?

I want to believe what He says about me. To learn the notes of this--His--song. I am His woman-daughter, maturing and growing ever-more confident as I walk equipped and empowered by His great grace to sing.

OK. Maybe I can play this song as I keep my eyes set on the Composer-Director.

Bringing it home...

How do you struggle to believe what He declares about you?

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sisters.

This is my flesh and blood sister. It isn't her birthday or the anniversary of some major life happening. It's just Friday and she makes me smile.

We live only a mile from one another. Our kids tumble and laugh and chase. And sometimes fuss. But she holds this place in my heart that insists I sit back and exhale a purposeful word of thanksgiving. I've never mentioned her here, in this my-reflection-space.

photo credit - stacey haines photography

These days our conversations steer towards our great God. We still quote our favorite movies or laugh at our own mama coming out in our words, but when we hover around and about our Lord, the bond goes deeper. What a treasure.

He does this though. He places people in our lives with which to be real--people who have seen us wearing our thick glasses with no make-up, or wiped tears from our eyes when life stings raw. People given as a gift, to sharpen and build and encourage.

We were not meant to live isolated days. He created with community at the root, that we would take off the veil of people pleasing perfection and just be. She is one of the ones He gave me--seeing me and loving regardless.

I love you my sister. My friend. He is doing a precious work in you.



Bringing it home...

Who is someone that He has given as a gift to your life?

Maybe today is a good day to tell them how much they are loved.

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eighties crunchy hair

I had crunchy hair in the sixth grade. Mousse-drenched, hairspray-secured, eighties crunchy hair. One day a boy noticed. As I passed him on the school sidewalk, he asked if he could touch my lovely brown locks. Flattered by his adoration I said "sure."

But he pretended as if my strands gashed his hand, as if blood now gushed out of his fingers. So dramatic. Apparently he had never touched anything quite so...crunchy. And my fragile, people-pleasing spirit walked back to homeroom crushed by a stupid boy's opinion.

Twenty-five-ish years later I am blogging about it. Hmm.

Since then, the Lord has grown me in the area of worth. I went from a timid desperately self-focused tween to a confident woman who now knows and believes what my Maker declares over me.

But to be honest, the tendency still tempts me at times. If left to wander in this flesh, I can allow the words of others to affect me--especially the opinions of those most dear to my heart. Thankfully He has taught me a few things along the way.

1. He has given me vision to see those wayward thoughts the moment they enter the scene. Unless we see them we cannot take them captive.
   


2. He has taught me how to replace those thoughts with Truth. His Truth. The things He declares over me.
   
   
   
   
   "You are fearfully and wonderfully made."
   
   "I am listening to your every word."
   
   "Every concern on your heart concerns Me."
   
   "You are a daughter of the King. Adopted into royalty."
   
   
   
   The flower blooms.

photo credit - flickr photo by nosha

As His Truth washes over those withered places, hope arises. If only that young sixth-grader had known. She would have walked back to class with her crunchy head held high.

Bringing it home...

How do you allow the words of others to affect your stance?

How can we actively, practically believe what the Maker declares instead of fallen mankind?

Daniel Fast-ers...

I am praying for you, believing Him to continue to pour out wisdom and understanding. He promises to reward those who earnestly seek Him.

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quenching that parched land

Shutting Him out of the moments comes natural. The loud from our world drowns out the conversation. Things fly into our day without warning and we stand there holding hurt feelings or bad attitudes...or muddy shoes that just trailed onto the clean floor.

Then, conversation with Him fades.

by kfocus

Reacting to that fluctuating heart or that minute-hand quickly making its way around the clock comes easy. Reacting in fear or fluster or fatigue simply flows without effort.

But breathing Him in means purposeful living. The waves of Truth begin crashing again as we push His name out of our lips, even when something within us insists we keep quiet.

"Lord."

Maybe it's a whisper spoken in soft desperation or a shout insisting that He show up, but regardless...it's conversation beginning yet again.

He created us to be in communion.

We need it to live. Like water to a parched earth.

by aimansewel

And He looks His daughter in the eyes when she speaks, giving full attention to her precious heart. Then He meets us there. In that very moment. Quenching. Refreshing.

Bringing it home...

How can we practically bring Him into our moments today?

From the Thursday mundane to the life-altering monumental, keeping the conversation going.

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virtuous woman

I learned an inspiring Bible trivia fact this morning in my moments of quiet before the dailiness ensued.

In the Hebrew Bible, the book of Proverbs is placed right before the book of Ruth. (Thanks for sharing, Miss Kelly Minter!) So the description of a Proverbs 31 woman leads directly into the story of this Moabite stranger turned Savior-lineage! This really struck me since I have a "penchant toward theological nerdiness" as Minter defines.

Proverbs 31:10 begins "Who can find a virtuous woman?" followed with a detailed description of an absolutely beautiful woman of valor. A woman that tends to make the rest of us feel a tad under qualified. But keep reading.

The light bulbs go off in one's head as we read Ruth 3:11 when Boaz describes Ruth as a "virtuous woman." You know I couldn't let this go. I took my theological nerdiness to the next level even at 6 a.m. and broke out my Strong's Concordance to find that yes, indeed, this was the same Hebrew word taken from Proverbs 31. And its definition inspires me. I'll share the highlights.

Virtuous: from the Hebrew word pronounced khah'-yil (make your friends think you are really smart) means strength, power, army, valiant, influential; this word signifies a faculty or "power," the ability to effect or produce something.

A virtuous woman moves and creates. She influences with great strength of character. She is focused and purposeful. And her lovingkindness precedes her.

But this kind of character in the moments will only happen of the overflow.

Girls, we cannot conjure up this kind of virtue. We cannot be kind enough or active enough or Martha Stewart-ish enough to sustain this level of beauty. It will only be lasting as it overflows from the power of the Lord within.

As our eyes stay set on Him--His face and His ways--as our watch makes time for Him, as our minds linger vigilantly upon Him, then virtuous spills out. And rejoicing is to come. (Proverbs 31:25b)

Here's a cool thing. As we daughters of the King continue pressing into the ultimate "Kinsman-Redeemer," that description of a virtuous woman will slowly become more like looking into a mirror--sometimes a mirror with a few smudges or messy fingerprints, but a mirror nonetheless.

Keep at it friend. Keep seeking after your First Love. He is making you to be gorgeous.

How has the picture of the Proverbs 31 woman spoken to you in times past?

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